Friday, April 16, 2021  
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Who The Heck Was That

                                                                                                       Who the Heck was That

    This morning a number of things came to me as I read, prayed and tried to understand the ironies of life.  As it turns out the somewhat sporadic notions all were inter-related.  I suspect the train of thought came from seeing the various people in my life head in a direction which seems to be that of searching for something they once had, never had or think they want.  It may be that what these individuals are going through is the infamous notion of "mid-life crisis", and yet I believe it is more than that.  What I see is a searching for answers based on the idea the material and physical aspects of our lives.  I've been there I know what it's about and I know that we think it can bring answers and satisfaction to our lives by pursuing the material components in life.  This will allow us  to reach some level of comfort in our lives, but becoming comfortable in life can not be based on the physical aspects of the world.  Now I know this sounds like something right out of the Bible and maybe it is, but I write this not as a quote or in a judgmental way.  It is written through the pain and experience of my life.  The Bible does tell us to give up our sinful ways but I like most saw such direction as just words which infringe on my comfort level of living and in some way they are just words that are written and will have no effect on many people's lives.  The truth is they are and will only be words until some how and some way an individual, any individual decides to see what they might mean to them personally.  The problem is this takes time, time we don't have, time that could be used for other more interesting pursuits.  I know I sound like the typical "born again" and for what that means to most people I am far from the definition of "born again", I am simply a person who said I am going to try and understand more in depth what God mean's to us humans.  I decided that I have heard readings from the Bible, most of the them the same ones over and over.  It was almost like we weren't suppose to have any further understanding of what was written than what individuals thought we should hear.  I know this isn't true but I certainly perceived it this way.  So, I began reading the New Testament, and much of it was just words but I will say I found some interesting stories which I think could be made into movies but haven't been as yet.  I also found some guidance which talks about a much kinder, gentler and loving God than our past knowledge paints of God.  Even so mostly they were still words, but that started to change because when I decided to start reading the Bible I also started praying.  It is hard to describe but over time I saw that the words aren't what is important, it is what the intent of the overall message really is that is important.  Then I started seeing how my life started to move from being physically and materially oriented to more spiritually oriented.  I don't feel like a "born again", I don't even act like a "born again" but I see the world in a different light.  I recall things about my past and it is like looking down on someone, and asking who the heck was that.  Now my frustration is two fold, how can I continue to grow in my closeness to God and how can I touch those around me when I see the gap between where they are headed through the search for the fountain of youth and where the real answers to this world lie. 

   One of the thoughts that started me writing about this whole concept of where we take our lives or think our lives need to go, was a conversation I remembered hearing a number of years ago when I was about 35 and there was a co-worker who in his mid-fifties and was having a conversation with another individual who was about 33.  The younger man was complaining about life and his complaints were valid but not overwhelming, the response of the older gentleman was, if you think life stinks now wait until later, it doesn't get any better.  This was a eye opening statement and I thought surely it can't be, but for many it is exactly true.  As youth we struggle to find ourselves in this material world we work hard on focusing on our careers and providing for our families then we reach a point when we say, what about me and we begin to focus on ourselves, what we didn't accomplish, sacrificed or begin to realize our bodies aren't 25 any more.  When this happens we begin to view life not as the oasis that we strived and worked for and that we would eventually find and reach a point where we are financially secure and we would be at peace with the world.  What happens is the opposite, we may reach a point of financial security but really what does that buy us.  Our children are grown, for all the worries and sacrifices we made for our companies we realize they didn't mean anything but high blood pressure.  We focused on the material world and that is all we know, so that is the direction we tend to continue to attempt to find our ultimate happiness and guess what it "ain't" there.  I know.  This is where I can tell you, (if in fact this is even ever suppose to be read), that what I have come to know but mostly feel with in my soul, is that as I grow closer to God's loving energy and realize what and who Jesus is, I see a chasm growing between my past life and where I was focused and I see that same chasm growing between my life and those around me who are trying to find or think they will find happiness by pursuing the physical components of this world.  I'm not at all judging because first of all I have no room to judge but I see where the path they are taking, is headed.  My advice if they would care to listen, which I doubt or if I could some how enlighten them to the idea, is to think about and maybe try a different approach, not in the full blown "born again" approach but one that just allows you to try and say maybe there is something more important, maybe the Bible could have some entertaining stories in it, perhaps I can spend a few seconds looking for Spiritual guidance. If they did, I think they will begin to understand that "those who have the Loving Energy of God in their life, have life, those who do not have the Loving Energy of God in their life do not".  In others words the more you bring God into your life, the more you know what life is really meant to be. (back to Spiritual Conversations )